@Deykun 

A neutron walks into a bar. 'How much for a drink here, anyway?' To which the bartender responds, 'For you, no charge.'

Two atoms are in a bar. One says, 'I think I lost an electron.' The other says, 'Are you sure?' To which the other replies, 'I'm positive.

Photons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.